“Congratulations, you made it to my speed dial. Number five, actually—right smack at the middle. So whenever I put my phone in my back pocket and accidentally call you up, I could make up a lame excuse and say sorry, it was just an accident. Then I’d ask how you’ve been, coz we’re in the call anyways so I might as well see what you’ve been up to. That’s also lame, but hey I bet it’ll work.
Congratulations, you’re on the top 5 of my list of people to call up if I get injured/harrassed or fall in a state of panic. I’d probably be screaming or bawling or my voice would be shrill but I know you won’t care coz you’d most likely be right over to ask me in person what happened, am I okay, do I need a beer, or a box of chocolates. Yes, a hug would be nice too.
Congratulations, coz you have a ringtone specified only for you. So whenever you decide to call me up, I would hear George Harrison’s voice singing to me in a happy upbeat voice, “Tell me what is my life without your love?” That line is absolutely cheesy but he could get away with it coz he’s a Beatle.
Congratulations, you’re now a fixture in my life.
Don’t you dare become an asshole.”
-Author Unknown